


Reset Again

by CeeJay (hyper_piggie)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Timeline, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, Existentialism, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-15
Updated: 2010-09-15
Packaged: 2017-10-11 21:17:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/117225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyper_piggie/pseuds/CeeJay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another take on what happens after John goes through the seventh gate, and the complications surrounding the future kids. Hypothetically takes place sometime around Act 4.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

John's heart raced as he set down his rocket pack and stepped into the lair of the denizen. It was cold and dark, he could barely see the hallway in front of him. Gripping his hammer in one hand he put his other to the wall for support and let it guide him further inside.

He swallowed back his fear as he rounded the corner into the room that housed the boss of his land. He rounded the corner. At first glance of the beast he dropped his jaw and his hammer. This thing was huge! Why did he even think he could... The hammer clattered to the floor, alerting the creature of his presence. John was frozen in place. He couldn't move. Couldn't even breath. The denizen opened its mouth and screeched:

bEEp bEEp bEEp

John's eyelids flickered and the ceiling of his room came into focus above him. He rolled over and flailed his arm sleepily toward the nightstand, managing to flick the off switch on his alarm clock. He rubbed his eyes with his other hand, slowly waking himself into a state able to comprehend the nightmare he had just experienced. He rolled out of bed and headed toward his desk, collapsing into his chair's cushion. He had to tell his friends about this one.

Surprisingly, none of his friends were online. No new messages either. Huh.

He shrugged and started sending messages of his own.

 **\- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -**

EB: hey

EB: I had this crazy dream

EB: I'll tell you about it later

 **\- ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -**

He stood up from the chair and raised his arms above his head in a comfortable stretch. He started to head toward the shower, but reconsidered. Maybe he should tell Rose too? She might try to psychoanalyze it or something. She could tell him if it meant anything cool, and even if it didn't it might be good for a laugh. And while he was there, he figured, he could tell Jade, too. She had mentioned that she really liked dreams. He set his fingers clicking on his keyboard and sent the two of them similar messages.

But at the end of the day, none of them had pestered him back.

They never pestered him back.

  


* * *

  


John woke up to the sound of ringing. He mumbled under his breath and fumbled blindly for his cell phone on the nightstand, wondering who on earth was calling him _now_. "Muh?" he answered, utterly incapable of making any sound more coherent in his morning stupor.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN!" a girl's voice yelled through the phone. He startled and quickly pulled the phone away to save his tender eardrums. When the squeal ceased he cautiously returned the phone to his ear.

"Thanks, Opal." He could hear giggling on the other line in response. "You know it's eight 'o clock, right? I was hoping to sleep in today."

"Oh, I know! I just _had_ to be the first to wish you a happy birthday! How does it feel to be fourteen?"

"Not much different than thirteen really."

"I didn't think so! Anyway! Daisy, Wheeler, and I are going to come by and take you shopping for your birthday present in two hours, so be ready!"

 _Click_. The girl hung up the phone and John rubbed his temples. He rolled out of bed, lamenting the fact that he was awake now. He began his morning routine knowing he would never get that extra hour of sleep he had planned back.

While pulling his new shirt over his head with a firm tug he reconsidered Opal's question. "How does it feel to be fourteen?" Now that he was more awake, it occurred to him that while today he might not seem much different than he was _yesterday_ , he had changed a lot over the past year.

John looked over at the corner of his room that used to display an impressive collection of Matthew McConaughey posters. He chuckled to himself remembering the day he took them all down. Only one remained; "A Time to Kill" was left up next to the new shelves he had installed in the place of his shrine. Adorning the shelves were bowling trophies that he had won over the past few months. When Wheeler first suggested bowling, John thought it would be totally lame. He had complained the entire time, but after he landed his first strike he couldn't help but get excited about the game. It turned out he really liked it, and he was good at it too. Yes, he still _liked_ McConaughey, but these achievements in his new favorite sport meant more to him now.

He smiled to himself and turned his attention back to getting ready. Taking a sweeping look around the room he considered what to take with him. On the table was his deck of cards, reminding him that he still needed to show Opal his new trick. He reached over and captchalogued them in his pocket modus.

Wondering how much time he had left, he flipped open his phone to check. Above the time display the icon informing him of a missed a call flashed. Someone must have tried to get a hold of him while he was in the shower, he assumed. He got a lot of calls these days, his friends were always so impatient! Always asking him to hurry to go places with them. Sometimes John wondered if it would be nice to just stay locked up in his room for a while, to enjoy his own space and not go anywhere. He remembered that it used to be that way, that a year ago he spent most of his time stuck at home, talking to his friends online.

He briefly wondered why he didn't talk to those friends anymore, but the thought quickly vanished. Did he ever even have friends online? What was he even thinking about just now?

In a daze of confusion he looked down at the phone in his hand. Oh yeah! He had a missed call from Wheeler. Most likely his bro was wanting to know if he was ready to go shopping with them. Rolling his eyes he let out a sigh. They were so impatient! Still, he knew the best change he had experienced this year was meeting them, they were always there for him, the best friends he could ask for.

He met Opal first. She moved in next door soon after his thirteenth birthday, and they quickly became friends. Later she introduced him to Wheeler and Daisy, and since then the four had become almost inseparable. Daisy had even bought him the new shirt he was wearing today as an early birthday gift. It was black with a picture of white ghost grinning slyly on the front, and it was his new favorite.

John headed to his desk, thinking that he wouldn't mention that he had got the shirt as a gift to Opal. There was no need to upset her by letting her know that she hadn't _really_ been the first to wish him a happy birthday. He captchalogued his wallet to his back pocket before turning toward the door. Suddenly a flash of red caught his attention from the corner of his eye. Curious, he returned to the desk. There on the top was a red box that he hadn't noticed before. It looked almost familiar. Without thinking he reached to touch it, but was interrupted by his phone ringing.

Flipping open the phone revealed Daisy's picture on the screen, informing him that she was the caller. She hated the picture he set to her name, but it was his favorite picture of her. He thought she was cute with her chalky cat ears sticking out, rather than hidden by the pink princess hat she normally wore.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Are you coming, John? We're all outside waiting for you."

"Yeah, I'll be down in a second."

He shut the phone with a snap and peeked out his window. There his three best friends stood, looking up at him. Daisy waved a tentacle at him, and Wheeler gave a cool nod. If you didn't know him enough to notice, you wouldn't see the slight smile at the corner of his amber beak.

Suddenly something about the picture struck John as strange, but as quickly as the idea entered his mind it was gone again. He turned from the window and started toward the door.

The red package was still drawing his attention from the corner of his eye, calling him to examine it, to uncover its mystery. John bit his lower lip... his friends could wait just a second for him to peek inside, he reasoned.

Stepping toward the desk the strangest feeling came over him. It was as though he was falling with each step. The kind of falling only felt in dreams, where you never hit the ground. It took all his concentration to continue forward without stumbling. He focused on the box in front of his fingers, trying to ignore the impossible way his walls were flickering in his peripheral vision.

John stood in a void of white with the red box in his hands. He furrowed his brow, knowing somehow that he couldn't think about anything but the box. If his mind slipped again, he wouldn't be able to remember. From the depths of his mind he heard the universe silently screaming at him to forget.

He opened the box. Red text scrolled through his mind.

 **one day your gooberish ways are gonna land you in a jam and i know im going to have to get you off the hook but its cool i got your back bro.**

John's mind was adrift in an ocean of deja vu. He was barely conscious of his hand reaching into a box and pulling out a ragged, dirty bunny rabbit.

This was _his_ bunny rabbit. Of course! He kept it right by his bedside. It had been there every night since he received it from his best friend last year.

Except he didn't.

He had never seen this rabbit before.

John dropped to his knees and cradled his head in his hands. "What's going on? I don't understand!"

He looked around in a panic, trying desperately to figure out what was happening. All around him there was nothing. Not even the floor he had dropped to existed.

"SOMEBODY HELP ME! I... I don't understand!"

In the vacuum of paradox space, no sound was heard.


	2. Reset Again Chapter 2

John tugged at the collar of his shirt and tried to calm his panicked breath. His eyes darted across the absence, desperately looking for some trace of reality.

There were times when, just in his peripheral vision, he noticed flickers in the whiteness, glimpses of his home and friends and recent past, all viewed through broken static. Sometimes the glimpses were of places he had never seen but he somehow knew, places he had seen in long forgotten dreams.

Was he going crazy? When he turned to look directly they were gone. There was no trace that they ever even were.

He shifted and hugged his legs. With a whimper he closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against his knees. "I don't understand."

 **I understand.**

John didn't so much _hear_ the voice in his mind as he saw it. It spoke with a line of constantly changing color, a rainbow patchwork that he could somehow hear.

He lifted his head and looked around the void. Nothing but white. "Hello?"

The multicolored text scrolled though his mind once again.

 **Have you had a good year, John?**

"What is this place? Why am I here!"

A tear in the nothingness appeared in front of him. He could see his room just beyond his reach. He could feel the reality of it.

 **You like this world, don't you? You like your world.**

"How do I get back? Please, just put me back!"

 **I can't do that.**

"Wha?... Who are you?"

 **I'm the one who made your world. I-**

"THEN JUST PUT ME BACK!"

 **I can't. Someone has disrupted my methods. They've ruined this world, changed the timelines so that it never even existed.**

"But... If you can create worlds, if that's really true you can just... Can't you just stop them?"

 **The changes to the timeline have left me powerless. I carelessly overlooked the prevention of this problem.**

"How did this happen?"

 **Do you remember your dream?**

John instantly knew the dream the voice was referring to.

 **You once played a game with people you called your friends. You took a shortcut.**

"I defeated that thing?" John asked in disbelief. "I don't remember..."

 **You didn't defeat it. You realized your true potential and left the game. That was when my powers were awakened. I saved your world. I rebuilt the Earth that was destroyed by meteors. I fashioned it, returned it to just how you wanted.**

John was starting to remember now. Only vaguely, but he remembered the game. Though a haze he remembered the countdown and the meteor that destroyed his home.

 **The other players didn't want you to leave, John. One of them has altered the timeline. They've gone back and stopped you from reaching your potential. Everything has been reset to that point. The past year of your life is gone, it never happened.**

Through the tear in the vacuum John watched his room fade to nothingness. The rip was gone, taking his home and his life with it. His jaw dropped.

"Never happened? Reset? What does that even _mean_? That I'm just stuck here? That I don't exist? That I'll never live, I'll never see my friends again?"

 **No, the paradox that you are still here is proof that you can correct this. You can bring everything back.**

"How?"

 **There is still time. You can go to the newly created timeline and reset it again.**

"So..." John tried to figure this out in his head. "So I have to stop the other players from stopping me? I just have to convince them to let me leave, right?"

 **No. It's not that easy. This timeline has already faded too far. You must sever the link that the new timeline is built upon. You must remove thing one thing they changed to create the new reality that is conflicting with this one.**

"What's that?"

 **You must kill yourself.**

"WHAT!"

 **It is the only way to return to your life. You and this other John cannot exist at the same time. Once the alternate version of yourself, the you that has yet to exit the game, is gone, then his reality will fade and yours will return.**

"I don't know..."

 **It is the only way. If you do not act, you will not exist.**

John looked around the vacuum. He could almost feel the tide of reality pulling away from him. He stood up and clenched his fists. "I'll do it."

A new rip appeared from above, and a hammer fell at his feet. The deadly looking weapon had a long black handle leading up to a head with gruesome spikes at each end. He equipped the Grim Re-Reaper into his strife specibus.

John felt another tear open to his left. Through it he saw a thirteen-year-old himself touching down near an oily river to readjust his rocket pack. It was now or never. He leapt through the opening into the alternate timeline that was stealing his existence.

From somewhere in the void that he left behind, a voice of colored patchwork text let slip a cruel laugh.


	3. Reset Again Chapter 3

John had finally made it into the Land of Heat and Clockwork, traveling fast through the shortcuts that Dave had instructed him on. He wiped his forehead and unequipped his rocket pack. The added heat of the device on his back had caused a pool of sweat to form on his lab coat, which felt refreshingly cool when exposed. The relief didn't last long though; the hot atmosphere was relentless here.

He took a moment to catch his breath and examine the surrounding area. Aside from one metal wall, the platform he stood on was exposed, giving him a view of the seas of rolling lava. The one wall that stood was decorated with gears. Rotating, turning gears that served no greater purpose than to distract the eyes of a bored player as he waited for his friend to show up.

"The ability to appear at any time and he still makes me wait," he huffed under his breath.

The sound of a scratching record echoed from somewhere to the left. John spun toward the noise, grinning from ear to ear in anticipation of meeting Dave face to face.

 _THONK_

Something slammed into his head like a sack of bricks. Behind the pain of the blow he felt his knees buckle and he hit the floor of the platform with a thud, wincing as his cheekbone slammed against the metal. He touched the side of his pulsing head and felt the cool, wet mixture of blood and sweat on his fingertips.

He could feel the footsteps clanking behind him and hear the grunt of his attacker preparing to strike again. He rolled quickly to the left just as the weapon was brought down, tearing a piece of his bright green jacket and pinning it to the ground with its spike. He pulled his arm away, ripping off a large chunk of his right sleeve and looked up in terror.

As if the fear of his attacker's near miss wasn't enough to cloud his mind, John was doubly confused by the what he saw above him. A young boy in a black shirt was looking very pissed as he struggled to pull the spiked hammer from the platform. This was no imp or monster this was... himself?

John looked up at his opponent in awe. His heart raced with adrenaline, but he was too stunned to act. He just watched, jaw agape as his other self finally dislodged the deadly looking weapon. When he adjusted his grip and readied it for another swing, John blinked and snapped out of his trance. Oh shit. He meant _business_.

John rolled again and scrambled to his feet, feeling the wind of a hammer swing just behind him. He rushed forward, nearly tripping as his boots slid on the smooth metal surface. Behind the ringing in his ears he could hear the frustrated grunts of his future self following each barely missed strike.

He reached the gear adored wall and skidded to a halt. He turned, panicked. The full body of Future John slammed him against the metal wall, pinning him down with the hammer's handle pressed to his neck. Future John pushed down and John fought to push back, wincing in pain as the pressure from the metal rod crushed into his adam's apple.

* * *

There comes a time in everyone's life when they contemplate their own existence. Where did I come from? What came before me? What happens to the world when I am not longer around to experience it? Is there life after death? Is there life before birth?

When you are staring into the struggling face of your younger self as you strangle them to death happens to be one of those times when, despite your attempts to shut them out, these questions enter your mind.

Future John closed his eyes and tried to focus on self preservation, but the whole situation was so confusing. He was murdering _himself_. How was this supposed to save him? His hands shook with uncertainty and he loosened his hold on the boy in green, who inhaled deeply and coughed as his windpipe refilled. Still, Future John held fast and kept himself pinned, unable to escape.

His mind raced. What exactly was going to happen once he died? Would things really go back to normal? Was this really _murder_? Was it suicide? Would he feel anything? Would he still really exist if he killed his younger self? He considered his neck and reasoned that he wasn't in pain from the wounds he had caused already. He opened his eyes and looked at himself, scared and helpless against the ticking silver wall. No, this wasn't _him_. This was someone altogether different. A different person with a different life.

A person who looked like him. Who sounded like him and smelled like him. But it _wasn't him_. He furrowed his brow and tightened his grip. There was only room in the universe for one John Egbert, and he was not going to let this boy take his place. He was not going to give up a year of life, all his experiences, all the good times he had spent with friends that this doppelganger didn't even know. He pressed forward once again, fighting against the hands that tried to push him back.

"I'm sorry. It's either you or me."


	4. Reset Again Chapter 4

Future John wiped his bloody nose with the back of his wrist. Looking up from his position sprawled back against the metal floor he could see his doppelganger hunched over on his knees gasping and wheezing for breath behind the boy who had decked him moments before.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Dave asked, wiping his bloody knuckles on the side of his red suit.

"Back off," he gripped his hammer and started to stand, "This is between me and myself."

Dave drew his sword and took a defensive stance between the two Johns. "Look, you're my bro, but I am not afraid to kick your ass if you're going to be stupid."

Future John surveyed the situation. Just moments ago he had been about to finish the job when Dave appeared and punched him hard in the face. It had been a year since he had last heard from Dave, and months since he had even thought of him. It wasn't like he was expecting a warm welcome.

"Don't call me your bro," he huffed, "You destroyed my life, and now I have to clean up your mess."

"Destroyed your life? I keep having to _save_ your gullible rump."

"You KILLED me!"

Dave pointed back at the younger John. Future John could barely see his terrified eyes behind the reflection on his glasses. "You wouldn't be here if I hadn't stopped you from..."

Future John's blood began to boil with rage, making the lava world's heated air feel cool in comparison. "You killed _me_ you jackass!" he screamed. " _ME_!" He lunged at Dave, who sidestepped and stuck his leg out to trip him. In his fury he tumbled over the limb, cursing himself for falling prey to the oldest trick in the book. He slammed back onto the steel floor that he was becoming familiar with.

Future John was sick of this. He just wanted to go home. He wanted to live again. "Why did you stop me?" he shouted, picking himself up again. "I was _happy_."

"Happy being _dead_?" Dave asked in disbelief.

"Do I look dead to you?" Future John asked, waving his hand up and down across his body.

"I don't know what the hell other alternate universe of time shitanigans you came from, but you _died_ when you went through that gate. My future self came back and we convinced you not to go. That's the reason you're alive now."

"That's the reason I'm dying now!" He just couldn't get through to this guy.

"No."

Both Dave and Future John were shocked to hear the weak voice speak for the first time. They turned to John, who was carefully touching his bruised throat. The red and blue marks spread across his skin like tie dye.

"You have to believe him," John pleaded to his future self, "He's my, our, best friend. I trust him. _Please_."

"Best friend?" Future John scoffed, "Didn't you hear him? He was in the future for nearly a year without you. And in that time he _never_ contacted us. Not even when I tried. When I needed a friend this past year, _he_ wasn't the one who was there."

In that very moment, Dave was silently thankful that he had placed himself in front of the John he knew. He wouldn't have wanted him to see his cool demeanor slip to reveal how much those words hurt.

He composed himself quickly, shaking his head. "No way, man. You're wrong. If I didn't contact you it was because you were dead. You can't message a dead person."

"You keep talking about me being dead like it's no big deal. You really don't care," Future John spat.

Dave was about to snap. "I WOULD NEVER LET YOU DIE!"

Out of nowhere a blur of orange shifted between Dave and Future John. Davesprite fanned out his wings to block Dave and John from view and faced off with Future John. Future John stepped back, confused and cautious of the strange Dave-like figure with a sword in its stomach.

"You wanna talk now?" Davesprite asked, his voice much calmer and more serious than his younger self. "Alright, let's get this mess cleared up. Talk to me, I'm the one that's been to the future."

Future John blinked. Something about this just wasn't right.

"Look," Davesprite confessed, "Every moment in the future... knowing that you were dead _hurt_. But that's why I had to keep going. I had to learn more, to get stronger. So I could protect you, and Jade, and Rose. But I always knew I would come back for you, man. I would never just leave you. And I'm not going to let you kill yourself now."

Future John wasn't listening. Something about this just wasn't right. He reached out to touch Davesprite, but stopped. His outstretched hand curled into a fist and he dropped it to his side. This wasn't right at all.

"Why are you still here! Why aren't you fading away?"

Davesprite looked confused.

"You're from the alternate future... Don't you feel it!" Future John questioned. Every moment he could feel the sting of nonexistance as it chipped away at his life. Eating away the past year, second by painful second. Why was Future Dave unaffected?

"When I came back to save you I prototyped myself with the kernelsprite. I'm not really Future Dave anymore, I'm Davesprite. That voids the timeline paradox, I guess."

"Bullshit!" Future John wiped his sweating hands on his pant legs and brandished his hammer once more. "I'm sick of this. I'm going back home." He swung at Davesprite, the spiked hammer's head flew clean through Davesprite's body. While he flinched, Future John rushed past, readying his hammer for another strike. He aimed for his younger self's head. This time he would simply smash his brains out. It would be quick and effective if he could only land the hit.

As he brought the hammer down his legs were pushed out from under him by a flying tackle from Dave. Future John greeted the hot metal floor once again.


	5. Reset Again Chapter 5

Dave pinned Future John to the ground while Davesprite hovered over, "You're not going to kill him," he said, flapping his orange wings, "I'm not letting him die twice."

"It's too late for that," Future John struggled, "One of us is going to die. You can't change that." He wriggled one of his arms loose and swung it to punch Dave in the ear. The blow didn't hurt him much, but it shook him enough that he loosened his grip. Future John took the opportunity to escape. He shuffled away but was too tired to get up. He was mentally and emotionally exhausted. It didn't help that his head was still pounding from the impacts with the floor.

"You just don't get it. It's not _fair_. You get to live." He looked up at Davesprite with disgust. "Everything I've known for the past year, all my friends, all the things I love, and everything I've become... It's all going to be gone. It's not fair that you get to keep going." He slammed the bottom of his fist into the metal with loud clang. "It's just not FAIR."

"Fair?" Dave replied. "What about Jade? Was it fair that when you died there was no one to save her."

Future John looked down at his feet. Jade hadn't contacted him in the past year either. This whole time he had been bitter about it but if what they were saying was true... He shamefully bit his bottom lip, "What happened to her?"

Dave shook is head, "She died, dude. We lost all contact with her and..."

Future John's eyes shot up. "You lost contact with her? That's it?"

"Well there was a big fucking meteor..."

"You didn't contact ME but I never assumed you were dead!"

"This game is dangerous!"

"What game!" Future John threw his hands up in frustration. "None of this is real! This is all your bullshit that you've pulled me into! I finished this thing. I left and went back to the real world. Maybe that's what Jade did too! You don't actually _know_ what's happened. The only reason that you're stopping me is for _yourself_. You're so stuck on this idea of being a hero who saves us all. You're not a hero! You're a selfish prick! You haven't made any sacrifices - not for me or for Jade. Even your future self gets a free pass from fading away!

"I'm the one who has to kill myself! Do you know how much that sucks? Do you know what it's like to wake up one day and be told that you have to murder the person that you used to be? I don't want to do this. When I look into my own eyes," he shot John a pitiful glance, "I see how scared I really am. I don't even know for certain if this will work, but I have to try. Because I can feel myself slipping away, and I know that my _friends_ are fading too. I can't let that happen to them. And even if I have to die, if taking my own life will restore their world, it's what I have to do. Just let me do this, and you can go back to playing this save the world game without me."

He hung his head and muttered to the floor, "You already played a year without me just fine. Why does it bother you now?"

"What about Rose?" Davesprite interrupted.

"What about Rose? I haven't heard from _her_." He shut his eyes hard and gritted his teeth in an attempt to cover up his disappointment with anger. "Is she a happy future sprite too?"

"Future Rose has already faded away."

Future John turned to Davesprite. He was speechless.

"You can call me selfish if you want. And I know I can be a prick. But don't you DARE accuse Rose of not caring. I was there when she choose to fade away. She was scared. She didn't know if going to the past to get you back would work, but she _did_ know that she would have to disappear. And she was willing to do it so that we could save you. Because more than saving the world, she kept fighting that year to get _you_ back."

Davesprite looked down at his shadow hovering over the scuffs on the metal floor. "There were nights, after fighting waves of imps and monsters, the two of us would make camp and we'd be so exhausted but we couldn't sleep. Sometimes I could hear her crying into that stupid rabbit she knit you. But I knew I couldn't do anything to comfort her, she needed _you_. So I just had to let her cry and pretend I didn't hear."

Both Johns listened with their mouths agape. Future John was numb all over. He didn't even feel the tears welling in the corners of his eyes. The heat of the burning planet evaporated them as soon as they fell.

He looked down at his hands only to notice that they were turning transparent. He buried his head in them and cried. Even if he still wanted to, there was nothing he could do anymore. His friends were gone. _Rose_ was gone. He was gone.


	6. Reset Again Chapter 6

John cautiously sat down next to his future doppelganger, letting his feet dangle off the edge of the metal platform. Future John didn't even seem to notice that he was there, he just continued to stare.

John turned his head to look behind him. Dave and Davesprite were watching from a distance. They were willing to give John some space, but were keeping a close eye on them in case his future self snapped.

He awkwardly rubbed his naked arm where his sleeve had been ripped off. "Ummm..."

Future John blinked and finally acknowledged his presence. He shot him a look and returned to gazing over the lava. "What?" he asked bitterly.

"I..." John considered carefully what to say, but he couldn't think of anything better, so he just continued. "I'm really sorry."

Silence. John looked at himself expectantly, but after a few moments he resigned to just joining him in looking out across the rolling red ocean.

A few minutes passed before Future John finally spoke. "I'm sorry too."

John jumped slightly in surprise.

"I'm sorry I tried to kill you. Well..." Future John bit his lip, "I'm not _too_ sorry." He sighed. "I hope you can understand."

John put a hand on his future self's semi-opaque shoulder.

"It's just... every thing I've done is gone now. I'm leaving everything, _everything_ , to you and... You're just not me."

John nodded. "Could you maybe tell me about yourself? What went on the past year that made me potentially you?"

Future John sighed and looked up at the dark sky. "I met some awesome friends. I got out of the house a lot more. I competed in a spelling bee, but didn't even make it to the finals." He managed a chuckle, "Don't study with Wheeler. He'll teach you wrong. I got my own cell phone. I started learning how to program games on it. I made this one, it was kinda cool. Really simple but..." he trailed off.

"I had my first kiss..."

John perked up, unable to hid his interest. "Really? How was it?"

Future John continued to look forward absentmindedly. He shrugged. "Really awkward. A little uncomfortable."

John's face dropped. Future John glanced over at the mess of disappointment and did a double take. He raised his hands and shook his head. "No, no! Don't worry, it gets better!"

John blinked in confusion.

"I'm pretty sure most first kisses are awkward. But it turns out okay, and it gets better with practice. I promise."

John was suspicious, but he let it go. "Who was it..." He stopped when he noticed that his future self's lip was quivering.

"Everyone is going to be gone," Future John's voice was shaking as tears streamed down his cheeks. "God! Were they even ever real to begin with? They were real to me but... But maybe I... Maybe I just _needed_ someone."

John didn't know what to say. He just let him cry. After what felt like hours Future John wiped his face with his increasingly less visible hand and choked back his tears.

"Does it hurt?" John asked, pointing to the transparent hand.

"It keeps getting worse. At first it was just a gentle pull, then like a vacuum sucking me in. Now it feels like my skin is getting peeled clean off. It kinda stings."

John cringed. "I wish there was something I could do. Something to keep you alive, like Davesprite."

Future John hung his head. It was too late. He was going to be gone any moment. He hid his pain and looked up at himself with a smile.

"I think you should take up bowling."

"Bowling!" John asked with a mixture of surprise and confusion.

Future John laughed. "It's not as bad as you expect."

John smiled. "Okay. Bowling."

Nothing else was said in the next few minutes that passed. John just watched as the alternate copy faded away into nothing. The potential John that he could have become was gone, and he could never come back. He understood that every new experience he would encounter would make him an entirely different person, and pull him farther away from the image of himself he had just talked to.

John pulled his legs up from the ledge and hugged them tight to his chest. It was a lot to take in.

The clang of footprints on metal alerted John of Dave's arrival. He sat down in the space that moments ago John's potential future self had existed.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Dave asked.

"I think so."

"What did he say?"

"He said I should try bowling."

"That sounds like the lame kind of thing you'd say."

John glared at him. "He also said you suck at spelling."

"What!"

John stood up. He had just died to give himself a second chance, there was no time to waste it. "Come on, we have to get to work."


End file.
